Thursday, April 19, 2007
Last night, my mother invited Robert and me to dinner, along with Sarah, her husband and Elizabeth. I thought this was a good step for my mother. It shows that she is getting back to "normal" or at least finding a new version of "normal" for her. During dinner, my mother pointed out the pictures on the wall to Elizabeth, saying "That's Auntie Martha ... that's mommy ... that's Auntie Ellen," etc. When she got to "Grampa", Elizabeth said "Grampa?" and "Papa" over and over as if she were calling to him and she was straining her neck and twisting in her high chair as if she were looking for him. It's clear that we grown-ups are not the only people who miss my father. Elizabeth has no clue about what happened to my father and it must hurt her to miss him and not understand why he's not around. She spent so much time with him -- almost as much as she spent with her real parents -- that she's bound to miss him and notice that he's gone.